Recently there has been a lot of exposure about Mormonism. Some good, some bad. The other day I had a friend who I respect and care about attack Mormonism with foulness, expletives, "you believe's", "did you know's", "Joseph Smith this and that's". Basically all things I've heard before, but not from someone I trust and love.
I have never been confrontational about my beliefs. I know they seem different and weird to people, but you know what, some of theirs seem that way to me. I think that we should live and let live. Even on my mission if I came across people that had a belief they were stalwart in and thought was the truth I would thank them for their time and move on (if they expressed no desire to hear about mine). I wouldn't push and wheedle like other missionaries I knew. I wouldn't insist that they need to come to my truth. If they had a belief I was happy for them, and you know what, I was an extremely successful missionary by teaching those who wanted to be taught.
All that said I'm going back to my railing friend who asked venomously "why do you even believe that? Why do you follow so many restrictions and rules? There's no truth in those, why not just have fun and enjoy life?" I've heard all these things before, I've thought about these things before. Here's my answer:
I am a Mormon, and I believe in my church because I hope. I hope beyond comprehension that the church is true. I hope beyond 'rational thought' that I'll be sealed to my wonderful wife for all eternity. My heart and soul ache with the losses of my baby brother Enoch and my brother in law Brian. Both of them were honestly too good for this earth and I hope beyond all my own comprehension and understanding that when I leave this world they will be waiting for me and I will get to wrap my arms around them and share eternity with them. I hope that the atonement is real, I hope that Christ really paid for my many many shortcomings. I hope that there is a world of Joy and Light beyond this one where I can be with my beloved family and friends. I hope. Plain and simple.
I also believe. I believe in the things that I'm taught because they resonate within me and feel right. I believe that there must be more to life than just this life. I can't comprehend passing on from this life to nothing. NOTHING, not even existence. I cannot believe that.
Long and short, I am a Mormon. I hope. I believe. I will not rant and rail at you for what I think is strange and restrictive. I do enjoy life, I don't need some of the things that other people "need" to have fun. I have some issues with some things that are not necessarily taught, but are widely believed, by my church. But I deal with those and do the best that I possibly can.
And you know what? If I'm wrong, and there is nothing after this life at least I had that brightness of hope; at least I lived the best that I could, making mistakes all the way, but learning and growing. If I'm right and there is more in the next world and I do get to be with my brothers and I get to hear my God say "well done, enter into the rest of the Lord" how happy will I be and I hope that you will join me there eventually.
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